Bringing the ‘Crud’ to God

By Joe Sullivan, MJ • Phoenix, AZ

“Wow! I never heard that before.” 

“Yeah! And he also said that life is like living in an old cabin with a cranky mother-in-law. There are things we just have to tolerate.” Anne raised one eyebrow and curled the side of her mouth. 

During my rehab, I was given counseling sessions, and I decided to take full advantage. Counseling can be quite helpful. The quadruple bypass did a number on my physical health, but I wanted to be sure my psychological health was taken care of as well. 

Anne had been counseling at the rehab center for 20 years. She was not Catholic but was intrigued when I mentioned some of the ideas I had learned from St. Bernard over the years. 

“We need to spend time every day in complete silence so we can calm ourselves and listen,” said Anne. “Many people have trouble with silence.”

 I added that St. Bernard says the human soul is like a sewer. The more we accept all the things we hate about ourselves, the more we can bring them to God and concentrate on Him instead of ourselves. “Now I get it,” Anne said. 

“Jesus says that not all vile things and uncleanliness come from without, but from within ourselves. (conf. Mark 7: 18 -19) That is why people have trouble with silence. We don’t want to deal with our own crud, stuff we hate about ourselves, and so we constantly distract ourselves.” “And that is why depression is so predominant in society,” quipped Anne. 

“Yeah! St. Teresa of Avila called it melancholia,” I added. I was able to tell Anne about some of my own “crud”, and it felt good to get it out. It also felt good to see a non-Catholic be so open about Catholic thought from saints she had never heard of before.